Friday, July 18, 2008

Problem 1, Solution 0

Three of my close friends birthdays are this month, and all three of them only want ONE thing... for the 'good old days' to make a comeback, and for me to get hammered through combination of jagermeister and straight vodka with them...more likely then not, resulting in obscene dancing and ludicrous sexual innuendos. Not that there's anything wrong with those two, it's just that when alcohol is involved, it tends to get more..erm..x-rated with strangers , if you catch my drift. Best to keep the nungas safely strapped into my shirt. 

The Raspberry Buttermilk Layer Cake

All nunga business aside, I don't drink anymore..and they KNOW this. I know that they know this...so why do I feel like such a complete douchbag macfaggins when I turn down the invite? 
I was talking to my cousin about this, and she could only suggest making new friends. 
New friends?
That's fine, but what about the old ones?
What about the times that Aubri and I were plastered and almost had a threesome with our two guy friends at our p.e. substitute teacher's house?
What about the time Laura and I went to incahoots completely wasted off of vodka that we had downed in the parking lot, and booty popped for 3 hours straight in heels?

Even though most of those memories seem completely fucked (yet, still hilarious), they're really special to me. So when they invite me to smoke out or drink at a party or a club, I can't. I can go, sure, but it's not the same. The awesomeness that would've been is replaced by silent awkwardness, filled with slurps of water on my part, and rum on theirs.

It's just so lonely, that sometimes I question whether or not a shot or two would REALLY make that big of a difference. Maybe not, but then it would become an expected behavior.. "well, you drank at my birthday, so come on pussy!"

LAMESAUCE.

I've also been having really demented nightmares lately, which i've decided to just let go, since dream interpretation is lost and pointless art.
One, involving the bananas in pajamas being eaten alive...internal organs spewing out and blood squirting every which way. 
Two, involving ballroom dancing with a corpse in a large red room.

ODD.


Starbucks can suck a nut also.

Not really, the people that work there (for the most part) are actually genuinely nice.

I'm also SUPPPER stoked about the fact that I can now successfully imitate CAKE texture and taste.
awesomeness. 







2 comments:

Disa said...

Haven't found the solution either. Making new friends helps alot, but you never want to let go of the others. And it's hard when they don't understand. The weirdest thing for me is having a boyfriend who will take Kombucha to a party some nights then one night after leaving possibly the greatest spiritual books store on earth (Bodhi Tree) he blurts out- take me to a bar! So I sit there at The Abbey trying to not think about how much more fun it is there when you are downing their delicious mojitos. That's what I get for being with a Gemini- two different boyfriends at any given time. Anyways I would love to start a trend of superfood smoothie drinking and raw chocolate nibbling to get that late night party high. Until then I will try and drag my buddies to Au Lac, if only for my birthday so they can experience the other side.

April Nicole said...

yeah dude, serioussssly.
I'm always trying to get my friends do to non food related things, so my diet won't be a problem..but for some reason or another EVERY activity seems to be more fun when alcohol is involved (go figure, right? hah)

I STILL need to go to au lac, I need to quit lagging on that