So there I was in my COMM 120 lecture class in a group I was assigned to randomly by number by the prof. 20 minutes to write out a demo speech to present to the class. Each of us in the group were frantically trying to figure out what the hell to write in those few fleeting minutes...
one of the guys in our group (who i've come to call vader flytrap because of this annoying habit he has of BREATHING WITH HIS MOUTH WIDE OPEN)
"uhhmm...we could teach them to..uh....tie their shoes?"
YES. WHAT A FANTASTIC IDEA!
because OBVIOUSLY, if you're attending university, you've yet to figure out how to do that...and would thus be something that people would be able to realistically apply to their own lives and have genuine interest in..
another guy suggested guitar hero.
I blow at that game, and we're only allowed 5-7 minutes to explain the necessary "steps". Not enough time.
how to use an iPOD?
hm...that might actually work...considering half of the free world OWNS an iPOD, but with apple fucking up all the time, only a good 1/3 of those people know how to properly operate one.
we need a good opening catch.
"I'LL DANCE LIKE THE 2 DIMENSIONAL GUY ON THE IPOD COMMERCIALS !" I announced loudly enough to cause a small echo in the room.
you're going to dance in front of 200 people...?
sure. why the hell not? I don't give a shit about these people, and besides..everyone in here is ugly, so I have no one I need to impress. HAH.
we got our speech ready, and I put my ipod on, strolling down the stairs towards the stage portion of the room.
busted out the Britany spears "it's britney bitch". haha
nothing quite soothes your nerves like britney spear's new song. seriously. the song is ridiculous, but also extremely catchy, so it's pretty hard to dislike.
And then I danced.
for a good, solid minute or so.
took off my ipod, and explained to the crowd that no, I was NOT having an epileptic seizure (though, that's probably more of what it resembled rather then any sort of 'dancing' I was attempting) but was impersonating the ipod commercial guy.
the speech was given.
we got good marks from the prof...
who called me ballsy and mad on my comment card sheet.
maybe just slightly...
All dancing aside, there's this really hot dude that takes the class now...but he's kind of fat...not that I have anything against people who are a little heavier....being slender is just a personal preference that I look for in the opposite sex...he has an insanely good looking face though. man.
the whole time I was just sitting there thinking, "man..I bet he'd be hotter then Sergei if he went raw...mmm....Sergei....."
and then I zoned off into my usual fantasy of Sergei Boutenko walking around naked fanning me with large banana leaves as I lay sprawled out in the sun, eating my raw desserts and drinking coconut water..
On the business side of things, next month I plan on taking out a small business loan to get "april's uncooked" up and off the ground.
I never realized how much REALLY went into doing all this...all the licensing and permiting needed....
who knew that it's illegal to sell food you made out of your home?
whatever. stupid ass california and our stupid laws.
if this were mexico, and i could have human fingers and toes floating around in there, and the health dept. wouldn't say shit.
oh oh oh!
I checked Goodwin's to see how my dessert sales were doing, today being day 8 they've been on sale.
27 slices sold so far.
earth cafe is still completely in stock...and there's only 2 slices left of my dessert.
you don't fuck with me.
imma bring you dowwwwwwn.