Monday, March 31, 2008

wasting money and a false sense of happiness

"Destiny is what you have always wanted to accomplish. Everyone, at some point in their life, knows what their destiny is. At that moment, everything is clear, and anything is possible. They are not afraid to dream, and to yearn for everything they would like to see happen to them in their lives. But for most, as time passes, a mysterious force begins to convince them that it will be impossible for them to live out that destiny."
-Paulo Coelho 

Time for a serious post.
Well, this part anyways...
I'm dreading school tomorrow.
Not because i'm lazy, not because I have better things to do with my time...because going...and taking these mandatory, mainstreamed "health science" courses, only isolates me from what I REALLY want to do.

If I could own my own restaurant one people through my food somehow...that's all I want.
I wouldn't care if I had to put in 20 hour days, and live broke, surviving off of other restaurant's veggie throw aways (which, in all honesty, i've seen..and actually look really good...damn wasteful bastards). I know a lot of people into raw foods talk about wanting to become a raw food chef...which I guess is only a natural response in wanting to spread the joy that raw foods has broughten them....

...but there's something deeper here... (no pun intended)
I can feel it (again, no pun intended)

I woke up this morning laying in bed, just staring at the ceiling (after only getting about an hour of sleep, because i'm a wigger and was trying to 'perfect' the apple pie cheesecake I made until around 4 in the morning)...trying to sort out what bullshit i'm going to have to say..and do...just to pass through these courses.. (they insist that meat is a valuable source of nutrition...OF COURSE! CARCINOGENICS ALWAYS ARE! that coconut oil is fattening,  and that food has just as much "life" despite whether or not it's been blasted to death in a microwave or oven ) Not that this will be hard. I'm really good at breezing my way through things, even if they couldn't be further away from my actual ideals...I just prefer to not feel like a complete fake JUST so I can pass the stupid class.

The only reason I'm in school, taking these courses, is because my parents will kick my ass out if I try to become a chef.
"come on april, you're good...but this isn't going anywhere..choose a profession with a future.."

So I put a smile on, and pretend to care, pretend to WANT this "future".
"yeah dad, i'm excited! i'm gonna bag me a future doctor!"

that's the spirit april. keep it up, so everyone will believe you, and nobody will doubt your intentions.


Sorry for the rant, I just needed to get that out the infinite world of useless and random cybershit.


Saturday: nada, kicked it with the fam. and tried to get the smell of chorizo out of the kitchen, since somebody decided to let the meat ferment in the garbage disposal. yummmmmmmy.
Sunday: raw basics class. didn't learn anything new really, as expected, but I met a lot of genuinely nice people interested in what raw foods could do for them healthwise. Met some lady named "T" who was hilarrrrrious. You have NO idea what a relief it is to find somebody who shares a similar sense of humor as you...especially when your 'humor' tends to be more on the tasteless/awkward/sarcastic side...
If you're reading this (which I doubt, unless by some freak of nature accident you discovered my blog), you are awesome, and I sincerely hope your friend is able to continue on to better, and ultimately optimum, health.
Oh man...there was the hottest dude in the class too...sheeeit, he was lookin all types of good....but (surprise, surprise) he was taken.
damn it.

i'm destined to die alone.
with 50 cats.
and probably some birds.

oh, and my plants...

I took some pictures of the happenings...not TOO many, since I didn't remember that I had my camera with me until the last 20 minutes of class..and even then, then consumption of food proved far more important then picture taking.

My coconut, notes, and the twice refilled cup of chocolate

I'm terrible with names.
Good with faces.
But for some reason or another..names just don't stick well with me.
I met this lovely lady: at the class...always cool to meet people that you've spoken to via the internet...unless those
people happen to turn out to be sexual offenders (like me, haha...jk...maybe), pedofiles, dumbasses, or you know...just really OUT THERE, fuglies who need
to be beaten with a stick.

Came home.
Decided it was time to make more desserts.
Ran to Clark's Nutrition (imagine if I really DID run? how awkward would THAT look...running on the side of the freeway?)
"to the organic grocery store...AWAAAAY!"
i'd do it.

naw. i'd probably get short winded a 1/4 of the way through, and hitch hike my way home with some horney old trucker named rusty.

The marble mudslide and apple pie cheesecake before being dissected with my handy cusineart knife

New favorite? So far, it's looking pretty good.

I found these berries on a bush in my backyard...I was tempted to eat them..but then had flashbacks to a bad wild berry experiance a few years ago...I'm currently on a mission to try and get my brother to "test" them for $10. His asking price is $20. Greedy bastard.

If I can't be a raw chef, I'm giving legal prostitution a serious consideration.
"take off my pants for HOW MUCH YOU SAY??"

I hear the Moonlight Bunny Ranch Farm is hiring..
that way people who ask me where I work, will just assume I plow corn or something.

"i'll plow your corn baby."



Lovingraw said...

plowing corn and prostitution...

does that make you corn-y?

April Nicole said...

why yes.
yes it does. haha

Disa said...

Crazy... this morning I woke up and proceeded to make a sloppy raw apple pie. Basic almond crust, a layer of tahini and sliced apples with an especially cinnamony and spicy mixture. I didn't care how it looked. I just knew that it what it was what I needed after seeing my Grandpa pass away last night and knowing that I had a day ahead of me where I might not have any raw food available. I know how you feel about the restaurant stuff. I had that same revelation about helping people with food. It may sound funny when you say it to other people but raw food really does heal. Haven't we all contemplated.." If only I had some of those fake boobs that are such a rage in this area" personal quick fix would include striping while the baby sleeps for a few months and then having the money to pay off my debt and get a business loan. But no I slave away for less than I could be making at a private sector job, to be paid by the governator and because I love the people I work with who let me feed them all of my raw creations. Keep at it girl, one day we will be there.